Ah, the sweet chaos of the Christmas holidays—for so many of us it’s the first time our kids return as bona fide college students! If you’re anything like me, navigating this “new relationship” has you wondering how on earth these fledglings left the nest and came back brimming with confidence yet mysteriously still unable to operate a dishwasher. Honestly, they can navigate international flights, organize housing, and stroll into clubs like royalty, but don’t expect a heads-up about when they’ll be home. Their phones, which work perfectly for messaging their mates in the UK, seem to lose signal when it comes to texting their location here. Funny that, isn’t it?
Having them back is like living in a time warp. On one hand, it feels like nothing’s changed—they still raid the fridge like locusts and leave cups in every room. On the other, everything has changed. There’s a new confidence in their step, a certain sophistication in their (suspiciously expensive-looking) wardrobe, and a sense of self-assurance that wasn’t there before. Either they’ve been taking budgeting classes, or I’m being played—my money’s on the latter.
For some, their return home is filled with animated chatter about adventures and newfound independence. They’re already counting down the days until they’re back in their university bubble. But for others, it’s a quieter homecoming, shadowed by uncertainty. Maybe things didn’t go as planned—the course wasn’t what they expected, or they’re not sure they’re on the right path. And here lies the parenting tightrope: Do you encourage them to push through and give it another go, or help them explore a new direction?
It’s a gut-wrenching dilemma. You want to shield them from every disappointment, but you also know the importance of letting them figure things out. Sometimes they just need time—to think, regroup, or breathe. My advice? Be the voice of calm and reason. Let them know it’s okay to change their mind, to take a detour, or even pause for a bit. The key message they need to hear? “You’ve got this, and I’ve got you.”
Of course, their return also shakes up the family dynamic. Siblings are thrown into a mix of nostalgia and sibling rivalry (complete with bickering over whose turn it is to empty the bin), and parents are left juggling new boundaries. One moment you’re refereeing an argument about the TV remote, and the next you’re soaking up the joy of having everyone under one roof.
Let’s celebrate the chaos, though, because watching them grow—quirks and all—is a privilege. Sure, they might age us a little faster (I swear my grey hairs are multiplying), but all we ask in return is a touch of respect. Maybe send us a quick text about where you are, or better yet, load the dishwasher. Unprompted. (Yes, I know—dream big.)
For those of you wondering if this is all worth it while staring at your decimated fridge (I’m positive I bought orange juice this morning!), just remember: It’s a season of adjustment for everyone. Whether you’re loving the noise and chaos or secretly counting down to the day they head back to uni, know that you’re not alone.
Here’s to us, the fridge warriors and peace negotiators, navigating this “new normal” with a laugh, a cry, and a well-earned glass of wine. Cheers to having them home—however short-lived it may be!
Now, excuse me while I go check if we have any milk and cornflakes left. Spoiler alert: We don’t.